but i'm feeling terribly upset now.. I MISSED MEETING UP WITH YISHAN DEAR!
if only i had not been stupid and take the bus instead of mrt.... if i had taken the mrt, yes i will be late. but it will not be like taking the wrong bus and end up going circles and circles before reaching amk.
and i'm so sorry ger.. for making u waste ur time waiting for me.
i'm really sorry sorry sorry!
there's so many things i want to talk to u about.. things that only u know the whole story... =(
miss u lots too...
and i'm starving too.. only now as i'm typing out the post, i'm munching on breadtalk bread for dinner... haiz... i need to start eating normal meals...
anyway, this post wasnt suppose to be in such upset tone one...
i really wanted to blog abt something happy.
so here it goes....
I want to thank YOU for giving me such lovely memories for christmas.. =)
(ya i may have said i was bored once... but seriously that's bcoz i talk without thinking.
erm... kind of happen all the times.. so cant really trust wat i say all the time. bcoz sometimes i kind of get a little messed up in the head. )
and to tell the truth..
i was really very very very nervous about meeting u.
so nervous i was, i cant take in food, i get dissy in the head, and many many more other things i cant do properly...
and even when i've met u, i'm still nervous. that's y i cant finish my food. and i kind of talk nonsense sometimes i think... (a little bit like now... )
and then sometimes i think u were trying to build up a romantic mood. and i think i kind of screw it up everytime. sorry for being such an un-romantic person. (for reasons pls see above.) and u said i had very strong protection around me. that i must agree! even though i place much faith in you, i dun quite trust myself seriously. so by practising self control, i'm protecting both me and you ba... hahahaha..
well, and that led to another truth.. (hahaha.. suddenly got lots of truth coming out le... )
i was drunk from that 2 cups of red wine. when i lay my head down, i could feel it spinning. somehow i kind of feel like been in a mild earthquake where things around me goes shaking... so i guess i should admire myself.. for keeping my senses even though it's close to gone already. hahaha.. so maybe i'm a even more controlled person than u are. =P
anyway, i felt really blessed that nite. to be able to share that bowl of dumplings with u gives an extremely 幸福 feeling. you know when u asked me what are the things that touched me recently, there're simply a lot of small little things but i dunno how to say it out. i guess i'm just dumb when it comes to talking. but really the many many little things do adds up to a big big big feeling. a feeling that till now i still dunno how to describe. but i think u shld kind of understand. (hopefully.. =P)
i think i'm a slow person... takes me longer to warm up. just when i'm feeling i'm getting closer, it's time to say good bye. i would love to hold ur hands and tell u that i enjoyed ur company very much and i felt really comfortable with u. hopefully i'll dare to do it the next time i see u.. =)
hmmm... i beginning to feel how insufficient the expressions faces i type out are. when i type a =), how do u know what level of smile i'm trying to show u? will you be able to picture my smiley face or it's just another 2 symbols added together? hmmmm...
there's still lots that i want to say. but coz i'm dumb besides talking and also in typing. i think i'll pause here...
P.S. ajeossi, boposshoyo
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